A Poem About Lust

One glance across the lecture theatre was all it took,

For him to notice her;

But she noticed him too.

*

They start walking home,

Their conversations are fun.

Are you 19 too?

No, I’m 21.

*

He doesn’t smile much,

But he smiles at me;

There’s something hidden in his nature

That I can see.

*

Beneath the serious face

And his ice-cold stare,

There’s actually someone

With the potential to care.

*

He thinks he can read me

Through and through,

And I just let him assume

Without a clue.

*

We cuddle in bed,

He says my tummy is cute,

How could anyone think

That this man is a brute?

*

I know that he loves me,

Because he keeps saying ‘I care’.

But avoids me when I’m crying,

Is that really fair?

*

I met his mother, with the clear footnote,

We’re not a couple;

He says everything should stay private,

It’s not worth the trouble.

*

He opens up to me

Sometimes four times a day.

And I crave his love,

So I’ll always play.

*

My satisfaction’s never physical,

So after, I chat;

I tell him how I see the world,

Then I ask him back.

*

He says he hates talking,

That he doesn’t see the point;

But he’ll stick a film on if I wanna smoke a joint.

*

I think it’s love,

And I laugh at those around me;

Their advice that I leave him

Is fuelled by jealousy.

*

We go back to his house,

But no one else is there;

He calls the boys for a party,

And so we prepare.

*

The party got messy

And I wanted to sleep,

I leave the garden

Because his friend is a creep.

*

I can’t find him,

He’s with his boys I suppose.

They went upstairs

To powder their nose.

*

Everyone is nice

But they are ultimately strangers.

But maybe their presence

Prevented the danger.

*

It’s time for bed now

We two were alone,

In the middle of nowhere,

His country home.

*

I’m upset,

I was ignored all night;

But at this point in time

I’m too tired to fight.

*

He kisses and tickles me,

Tells me to relax.

No I’m pissed off,

I’m just stating the facts.

*

It takes me a while,

But I can’t stay mad.

Maybe just one quick kiss

He’s not all that bad.

*

But just one quick kiss,

Is more than enough

To entice his appetite

And his grip becomes tough.

*

I said I don’t want to,

I’ve got to stay strong;

He tells me quite briskly

That it won’t take long.

*

It begins and he’s heavy,

So he flings me on top;

Several times now

I’ve begged him to stop.

*

I gawp in horror

As his eyes roll back,

But the fight for defence

Has been lost by attack.

*

He’s off his face,

So won’t remember tomorrow,

But how could I forget ever

Feeling this hollow.

*

He rocks me quicker to the point

That I can now stop;

As he fills me with liquid

I feel a tear drop.

*

I collapse on the bed,

And he begins to snore.

Dazed and confused

I stare at the door.

*

There’s no where to go,

It’s pitch black outside;

And London from here

Is a five-hour ride.

*

Oblivious at breakfast

He tells me to smile,

I wonder how I never saw

That this man is vile.

*

How could he forget?

I don’t know what to say,

I squeeze my eyes shut,

But this forever replays.

*

He hugs me and tells me

That I am a gem,

That I make him so happy

And I’m more than a friend.

*

I’ll do anything to forget it

I just want your love,

Hold me and tell me

That I am the one.

*

He can’t do that

But says I’m his best,

He says forgiving each other

Is the ultimate test.

*

Several months later

I’m still by his side.

He said that he’d change,

And in some ways he lied.

*

Because of course nothing changed,

And he was the same;

This one time he even called me

His ex-girlfriend’s name.

*

I cannot accept that

This is the peak of our love.

My life has been wasted,

And I’m giving up.

*

I care about nothing,

My body is numb;

I howl in bed

For only nothing seems fun.

*

He says we’re unique

And I often give in,

But you only feel this low

When you’re exposed to sin.

*

I claw at my skin,

But it brings me no pain

How have I let this happen

Again and again?

*

It takes me a while,

But I have become un-blind;

I tell him to jog on

Because I’m losing my mind.

*

Being alone

Doesn’t help much at all;

I know no one would catch me,

If I were to fall.

*

But I fell already

To the lowest of my low;

When I found out that my lover

Was in fact just a foe.

*

I scream and I’m livid,

I didn’t think I was the type,

Who’d let a man rape her and still remain kind.

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1 thought on “A Poem About Lust”

  1. Ahhhh this poem is really really a great depiction of how unobvious and hidden a woman can be maltreated and emotionally and physically abused. And I am so happy you have put this on a website to make the situation made aware. Women are vulnerable and sensitive especially when it comes to opening up your love to another person. I know that this has happened to me and likely many other women. When a women says no to sex… it should really mean no. Sex is a two way action which fundamentally requires two desiring parties. So thank you for writing this!

    Well written and love the style too.

    Liked by 1 person

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